Apples and Oranges


When it comes to important news, you have to find balanced and reliable websites like the Bright DrewTopian Future blog to really know what’s going on. Most people are likely distracted and unaware that an important event will be happening this week. Tomorrow, Tuesday November 5th, my daughter’s preschool will be holding an election to decide what their favorite fruit is. 


We have been getting slammed these past few months with reminders about this election in the school’s newsletter. It seems like every second or third announcement is about this. “Don’t forget to ask the kids what their favorite fruit is! They’ll need to make up their minds soon! They can even decide early this year if they want to!” 


It’d be bad enough if it were just emails or the paper newsletter they hand out at afternoon pickup. But now we’re getting texts! The school is robocalling us! They even made us download an app so that they can communicate directly with us.


I’m sick of it man. Exhausted. I don’t even care which fruit it is by this point, I’ll just be glad when it’s all over. 


I’m mean, sure, in theory I guess I appreciate the school tradition of preschoolers voting for their favorite fruit. After all, there’s many promising ones available with a whole variety of flavors: strawberries, pineapples, grapes, even pears, though they’re not flashy, are very dependable. Personally I’m a big banana guy, but there’s also more experimental fruits that appeal to a younger crowd - the lychee, the kumquat, the dragonfruit, the durian (which I do NOT support because it is far too radical). 


And yet, let’s be really honest, it seems like every year it always comes down to a choice between apples and oranges. That’s because as much as these two fruits supposedly hate each other, they also need each other. They are essentially in cahoots to ensure there’s never a viable third fruit alternative.

Wouldn’t it be nice to get some fresh fruits in there?


Apples and Oranges - this dichotomous choice has been a continuous pattern at the preschool, other than a few years ago when the kids elected a vegetable during the COVID 19 pandemic as a stop gap measure. Given the circumstances the kids deemed fruit to be too frivolous “for these unprecedented times”. 


Let’s be clear, no one can agree on anything. Picking “favorite fruit” is always going to be a compromise. It’s choosing the lesser of two evils.


I guess at the end of the day, the preschoolers should at least feel grateful that they can still pick between apples and oranges. I’ve heard stories about other preschools where the kids don’t choose but are simply compelled to voice their endorsement of a rotten barrel of spoiled potatoes or a fat droopy sack of rice that’s well past its expiration date. 


So, despite flaws in the preschool’s current system, voting for “favorite fruit” is still a chance for everyone’s voice to be heard and an important practice of democracy for the kids. 


Here at the Bright DrewTopian Future, we strive to bring you the bias-free facts, often at great personal risk and journalistic peril. Stay tuned for up-to-the-minute information as the preschoolers decide “what is our favorite fruit in 2024?”